Catching, Falling, Wishing
by Lonely Kitty
Summary: Yullen drabbles for Sushi Panda Shot Seven:Goodbye There was a certain disdain that grew over the years for that word. Shot Eight:Capricious Sometimes, they dont act they way they look and sometimes they do.
1. Shot One: Tag

LK- nya, this is all the Panda's fault

LK- nya, this is all the Panda's fault! As if I don't have enough ficcy's to go on already. But I love D.Gray-Man so it's alright. (but what about the Penguin's story to…) and I still haven't finished my Cross Crack fic. Oh well, that will have to come later. This wont be more than 5-7 chapters because 1.im just to lazy 2. they are short and drabbles and 3…I forgot but the point is that these are for the Panda! Please R&R!

**Disclaimer: I don't own D.Gray-Man, just an Allen keychain and a very cute Allen pin. ******

By: Lonely Kitty

Shot One: Tag

Catching, Falling, Wishing

"Baka Moyashi!!" roared Kanda as he charged after the cursed teen. The said boy gave a yelp of surprise as a black katana swept dangerously near his right ear, a few innocent strands of white floated to the ground. Disturbed of the close proximity of the last attack, Allen foolishly glared at the raven haired man. Only Kanda glared back with a much more deadly look. Allen nimbly dodged another enraged attack and gave an adrenaline filled yell.

This was another of Lavi's stupid, yet amusing, ideas gone wrong. Well, originally, it had started out as a simple game of tag with Kanda, Allen, Lavi, and Lenalee but of course, the best of buddies in the entire world, Allen and Kanda, decided that it needed a little bit more fun.

So Allen tripped on a random rock that was jutting up mischievously up from the ground and landed on Kanda, or better yet, landed a big kissaroo on him. Well then, to say that all hell broke loose was an understatement.

The consequences of Allen's one simple clumsy act cost the lives of several trees, the landing in the hospitable of 22 finders (a few took pictures, the rest were just stupid enough to get in the way), Lavi getting seriously beat up, a one hit K.O of a Komorin, a nervous Lenalee, and a poor, exhausted, little baka moyashi.

"Come back here so I tear you to shreds Moyashi!" Kanda leapt up to land in front of the half terrified, half irritated boy. "You actually think I would do that BaKanda!?" Just as swiftly, Allen dodged the swipe of Mugen aimed for his head by ducking and carefully aiming a well put kick at the samurai's knees.

Faster than Lavi could crack a joke about Kanda's feminine looks, Thee Mighty Yuu came crashing down…once again on poor defenseless Allen.

'Meep' Oh Lavi was going to get beat up seven times over before he even got up for him stupor, if was stupid enough to get up that is.

-:--:-

The rest has been censored for the audience's safety, please come again when the duo are not trying to jump each other, thank you!

-:-

LK- now don't blame me for the utter randomness, shortness and crappiness that is this, I just ate chocolate and a half a gallon of milk (yes, I can do that) Panda! Sorry about your little…AX gift, if I had called you it would have ruined the surprise! So nya, please review! I might update tomorrow considering various Lavi Bunnies invading my mind, until then, I'll do my best nya!

The One and Only, Lonely Kitty


	2. Shot Two: Ends

LK- since the first chappie was so…utterly random, I'm making this chappie a bit more angsty, (a lot more angsty) hope you like it! (sorry Panda, chocolate is a wolf in sheep's clothing to me) Thanks to Digimagic, seasnake.756, SilentKiller1, and EatnRunBandit for being awesome, thanks to everyone else who put this on alert and faved!

**Disclaimer: Located in first chappie please :D**

By: Lonely Kitty

Shot 2: Ends

Catching, Falling, Wishing

"You're so stupid…Moyashi" gasped the swordsman as he clutched a crimson stained chest. Ribbons of wine red liquid escaped between slender fingers at an alarming rate. But the samurai didn't seem to have an intension of stopping them.

The white haired boy lay sobbing by his side, clumsy fingers desperately trying to keep wavering hands in their place while he tore off another piece of his white shirt. Allen lifted the tattered exorcist coat from his senior's injured body, quickly adding another makeshift bandage to the numerous others.

"Kanda…" he said weakly, exhaustion and fear gripping him tighter and tighter. "…you can't die, you just can't!" Allen gave a helpless yell as he bit down on the torn sleeve of his undershirt. Carefully making it as straight as possible, he wrapped it around the other straps of white cloth that had been dyed blood red.

"Are…are you just going to sit here dying? Without even _**trying **_to live? No, I suppose I was a fool, for thinking you were strong."

Even though Allen ranted on about how stupid the samurai was and how stupid **he** was for thinking he was better than that, tears fell down from silver orbs in cascades. Never ceasing for a moment until his eyes were nearly closed shut with constant rubbing.

In truth, Allen was hurt far more than physical wounds. Hurt that Kanda had been reduced to this emotionless stupor. Hurt that it was his fault he was like this. Hurt that Kanda had already given up trying to live. Even now, Allen had to slap his face or make vulgar comments to keep his comrade awake. But it almost seemed as if Kanda had lost the will to live, even suggesting that the cursed boy should leave him be and save his own hide.

Kanda let out a gruff sigh, weakly attempting to lift his hand to run his fingers through his hair, but failing miserably. Somehow, the Beansprout managed to notice and hesitantly treaded his fingers through his knotted strands. Kanda gave a weak glare but said nothing.

Allen gave another mournful sob.

-:-

It had been hours, and it was freezing. Allen had lost all sensation and Kanda finally had lost consciousness. Innocent blurs of white lightly kissed pale cheeks and remains of salty tears frosted over to form a small stream of crusted white.

Still, Allen's hand remained faithfully above Kanda's pierced heart. Blood had long stopped flowing but Allen had also ceased feeling a steady thump that should be under his hand. He gave an inaudible whimper.

His silver eyes had glazed with a dollish look. They stared at nothing yet seemed to see everything. In truth, Allen doubted there was anything else out there but the swirling cold and endless white. He felt void of everything. Pain and consciousness merged to form a single thought.

'_im so sorry'_

Slowly, Allen's eyes drooped more and more until his head came to rest next to Kanda's cold cheek. _'just…for a moment' _He thought with a hazy mind. Allen stared listlessly as swirling puffs came out with each ragged breath.

A cold blast of air forced his half lidded eyes to shut. Chilling him and bringing him to a last excruciating breath. Forcing a silver eye open, he steered his blackening eye sight to the cold samurai's face. He vaguely saw a disfigured hand caress a icy cheek.

'_Kanda…I…I'm sorry'_

Allen closed his eyes, and let himself and everything around him come to an end.

-:-

LK-…review? (ack, I just made myself cry)

The One and Only, Lonely Kitty


	3. Shot Three: Sleep

LK- nya, soo sorry for the wet pillows and endless tears, I promise that this one will be much fluffier! This idea was spawned one late night while I was hyper off chocolate milk and Panda was telling me to go to sleep. Thanks to seasnake.756, nanachan87, SilentKiller1, and YugiKitten for being superawesome. Thanks to everyone else who faved and alerted! Some language in this so rating went up, sorry!

**Disclaimer: Located in first chapter please!**

By: Lonely Kitty

Shot 3: Sleep

Catching, Falling, Wishing

Kanda had always thought that nights were peaceful. Where everything was cloaked in darkness and the only lights around came from the brightly illuminated moon and distant stars. And the best trait of all, it was silent, blissful uninterrupted silence. No one to disturb him and he was left alone with his thoughts. Of course, all of that was _before_ Allen Walker became his official partner.

"Kanda! Kanda!" the raven haired man tilted his head in annoyance as the bright cheery parasite exorcist came bounding toward him. Allen skidded to halt and gave him a grin.

"Our room is this way! Come on, come on!" Allen skipped away merrily, his ever faithful golem leading the way.

Oh how Kanda wished for the day when he would finally be able to shove Mugen down the baka moyashi's throat. Grudgingly, he followed the hyper child to the room marked 109.

For a moment, he paused at the door. His right hand had already curled up and positioned a few inches away from the door as if to knock. _'what the hell? Why am I knocking? It's not as if the baka moyashi's doing anything right now, he's probably already asleep…'_

Unfortunately for Kanda, Allen was currently doing something that Kanda had hoped he would never, **never** see in all his life. Frankly, to this day he still flinches at the memory for various reasons.

Allen was jumping on the bed, every time he jumped high enough to hit the ceiling he let out another squeal of delight. He bounced from one bed to another. Mussing up sheets, scattering pillows, and all the while laughing as freely and as joyfully as a child would.

If Kanda had not been so keen on his self control, he would have jumped the poor boy right then and there. So, he instead acted on the alternative and quietly strode up to the bouncing boy.

As soon as was close enough, Kanda grabbed his partner and clutched him close. Allen let out a startled yelp as he struggled in the offender's arms.

"Kanda!" he yelled as soon as he could see who it was who was holding him so tightly. An angry (though it could have been mistaken as a cry for attention) pout spread on the cursed boy's face.

"Put me down you big meanie!" Allen resumed his squirming, desperately trying to get out of the samurai's grasp.

"What the hell were you doing you baka moyashi? What the fuck are you a kid!? I've never seen anything so stupid before in my life" with that, Kanda dropped the suddenly silent boy to the ground and went over to his bed.

Kanda fixed up what remained of his trashed bed and promptly sat down. He spared a glance at the moyashi who had not moved from where he had left him. His tiny shoulders gave a shudder before he jumped up, gave Kanda a harsh glare and stomped over to him.

"You know BaKanda, you don't have to always be such and ass, just for that, I'm going to make you regret ever being such a jerk." A devilish grin slowly covered the not so innocent teen. Kanda involuntarily felt a shiver run down his back.

-:-

"Go.To.Sleep!!" Kanda yelled for the seventeenth time. But the white haired boy paid no heed. Instead, Allen gave an evil glare at the exhausted samurai and resumed his non-sensible chatter.

In response to Kanda's unnecessary rudeness, Allen decided to counter with being what Kanda hated most, annoying.

So in the span of 6 hours, Allen had called up room service 79 times, contacted Head Quarters 53 times (more than half were calls to Komui to insure that he would not be murdered by his comrade during the time of the mission, even going as far as to restrict usage of Mugen on any life form other than Akuma less he be retired as an exorcist, the rest were to Lavi and Lenalee), watched 34 different movies (all either comedy or romance to further annoy), and other mindless chatter that had not ceased even at the god forsaken time of 3:17. Kanda vowed to tear that child apart the second he had the chance, after all, 'accidents' can happen while fighting akuma.

But damn it all of he found out how the bloody hell the cursed teen could stay up so late and still be so god-damn hyper. Kanda was not one for laziness but even he could not keep up that level of activeness, and at that frightening consistency.

A small 'beep' drew Kanda's attention from his thoughts and turned to look at the humming white haired boy. He was staring at nothing in particular with mild interest, he almost seemed to be thinking of another way to keep up his devious promise. Finding nothing, he decided to go back to the beginning of what started it all. He decided to talk to Kanda.

With the small pressure he felt at the side of his bed, Kanda turned to glare at the white haired teen, thought it turned out to half hearted. Kanda hated to admit it but he was exhausted, he needed sleep and Allen clearly wasn't going to let that happen. In his sleep deprived stupor, Kanda acted out more on instinct than on rationality.

Before Allen could get past some childish insults, Kanda reached out and locked his strong arms around Allen's waist. Allen let out a startled yelp which was quickly silenced as the raven haired man forcefully pressed his face into the feathery pillow.

"Go to sleep, or else I'll make you." Kanda said menacingly, it wasn't a request, it was an order. Allen let out a soft 'meep' before retorting quietly, "And just how am I suppose to sleep like this?"

Kanda spared a glance at the bean sprouts position. Truthfully, it didn't look like a comfortable one. His head was pressed face down into a pillow, courtesy of his hand, and his waist twisted at an odd angle so that his legs and feet hung limply over the side of the bed.

With a tired sigh, Kanda effortlessly lifted Allen up and placed him on the far end of the bed. With another flick of his wrist, he threw the blanket over Allen, covering all but the top of his snowy white hair.

"Now, go to sleep, and if you talk again, I beat you to a bloody pulp." Kanda gave one last sigh before letting himself drift off into the long awaited sleep. Perhaps he might have just dreamed it, but he was sure that he felt a pair of arms embrace him tightly. Maybe…

-:-

When Kanda woke up, he was a bit more than disturbed when he was face to face with a flushed Allen, half deprived of all cloths and reeking of something sweet. Even more so when he found he was in the same condition.

"…fuck."

-:-

LK-…XD, no they did not have whatever you may be thinking, I just thought it would be cute if Allen was a restless sleeper, and they smell sweet because Allen left a bunch of candy on the bed. Sorry for the late update, I intended to upload this yesterday but I didn't get the chance. I'll upload sometime later this week, until then, I'll do my best nya!

The One and Only, Lonely Kitty


	4. Shot Four: Catch

LK- Ok, I found out a reason to pick on Kanda so much, cause Allen cant get one (censored) break! I mean honestly! Does Hoshino-sensei **want** Allen to go emo! (referring to recent chapters of the manga) (sigh) I was going to make this chapter happier but damn, R&R please… oh! Thanks to JudaiHaou'sGirl and SilentKiller1 for being superspecialawesome!

**Disclaimer: Look in chapter 1 please :D**

By: Lonely Kitty

Shot four: Catch

Catching, Falling, Wishing

"Hey Kanda, what do you think of when you look to the sky?"

It was an innocent question asked by a white haired boy with a glazed over look. Staring distinctly into the sky but almost as if he saw nothing at all. His gaze was hollow.

Kanda shifted uncomfortably. Rarely did he see the cursed boy with such a solemn look, filled with such remorse and sadness. The constant smile that was almost always found on his face was absent, sent fleeing to some unknown location. In its place was a small curving of his plait lips, not a smile nor a grimace, but whatever it was, it held nothing of its former warmth.

Kanda eyed the boy, giving him a how-am-I-suppose-to-answer-that look. But Allen wasn't looking at him, he was still gazing grievingly at the white washed sky. Looming cumulous clouds threatened to spill over any second. The very air seemed drenched with the incoming rain.

"Che, what kind of stupid question is that, I'm going inside" Kanda retreated from the railing, leaving the other exorcist alone to become engulfed by the downpour of rain.

-:-

"Hey Kanda! Look, it's a festival, let's go see!" Kanda barely saw the mass of white hair and a black coat speeding off towards a wide spaced field. With a tired sigh, he followed.

Allen and Kanda had completed their simple mission of exterminating a horde of Akuma from a village somewhere in the Alps. For the moment, Kanda had requested their finder to reserve a hotel for them while their wounds (more Allen's than Kanda's) to heal. After some thought, Kanda thought it would be okay to sightsee a little bit since the train wouldn't arrive until nightfall.

Kanda reached the festival grounds in surprisingly little time. He treaded around people and venders and grudgingly glanced around for the idiot bean sprout. Steadily, he could feel his temper rising in irritation.

'_I swear, once I find that idiot beansprout_ _I'm going to tear him apart and…'_ a sudden tap to his shoulder brought Kanda out of his thoughts and automatically brought down Mugen to the idiot who had decided to confront him.

He gave a slight jolt as he came to face Allen's hesitant smile and raised hands. Silver eyes glanced at him warily as he nervously edged the katana away from him.

Kanda heard a faint 'anger management issues' coupled with a sigh before Allen's bright grin (though with a tad of unease etched in) spread out on his pale face.

"Kanda, it seems that this festival is called Free's Festival after the village's founder. They even release lots of colored balloons because of the legend Free-san started when he came here."

Kanda glanced down at Allen's face. He seemed genuinely interested in the old legend and Kanda vaguely wondered how he had come to know so much of the festival in so little time. More curious in that than the great achievements of Free, he voiced his question.

Surprise flourished over Allen's face, silver eyes widening for a scant moment before hiding behind a curtain dyed white. A smile Kanda had seen all too often spread slowly over his face. He had seen it countless times before, such a fake smile.

"I came here before, with Mana once…"

Kanda tensed. Allen had rarely used that icy tone, wasn't Mana his foster father or something? Why would he be cautious so of the subject? Oh right, he turned his father into an akuma.

Kanda had half a mind to shove Mugen down his own throat for being so stupid. But a sudden excited gasp brought him once again out of his thoughts. Kanda gave a confused frown and followed Allen's line of vision, he gasped himself as he saw why.

All across the evening sky were splotches of wild color. Orbs of mismatched and mulit-colored balloons wove themselves around and floated whimsically up toward the unending sky. Even the sky to, seemed to partake on the spreadsheet. The middle was the same as it was earlier of the summer day, cool and blue with splotches of white transparent clouds.

Tracing the jagged circle of blended aquamarine and navy blue were varying shades of pastel pink and light lavender. Slender strands of goldenrod and orange weaved their way through the outer edges into it settled once again into a deep dark navy blue.

Transfixed by the brash display of color, Kanda and Allen stayed until the last lone orb of light blue had disappeared into the night. Kanda felt Allen shift beside to lay down the grass. After a moment, he flopped down beside him, ignoring for once, his constant maintained wariness and unease.

"They say…" Allen started off, his eyes dreamy and content "…that no mater how hard everyone looked, no one has ever found one of the balloons released here, they say that the balloons go to the heavens with their prayers" he gave a soft chuckle, silver eyes never wavering from the skies.

"I wonder if that's true…?" Allen closed his eyes, his mouth twitching upward into a pleasant smile.

'_a real one' _Kanda thought absentmindedly. '_Hey Kanda, what do you think of when you look to the sky?'_ Kanda frowned as the question Allen asked a few weeks ago came back to him.

Actually, it had never stopped plaguing him, often waking up at night and staring at the pale moon through his window, or noticing how the clouds would cross the path of the sun and cause shadows to grow along his way. It was unnerving yes, but Kanda just couldn't find himself to answer the idiot beansprout. But silence never did last long for him.

Allen's light voice drew him from his mindless thoughts. He was mumbling, or was it humming? Kanda couldn't quite tell until Allen spoke up.

"Well, Kanda, do you have an answer for me?" he almost seemed comedic with his tone. Kanda felt a surge of annoyance at is words, he knew what he was talking about but he didn't have an answer, at least, he thought he didn't.

"What about you, baka moyashi." Kanda retorted, the beginnings of a smirk spreading across his face. Allen merely smiled.

"I wonder if I can ever catch up to it." Kanda's smirk faltered as he gave him a confused glance instead.

"The sky is so far away, its like everything we've worked up to until now, I wonder if we'll ever catch up to it, or if we'll just fall behind." Kanda lowered his gaze. _'so that's why…' _

"Che, baka moyashi, of course we will." Truthfully Kanda wasn't to sure himself but the bright smile that suddenly burst into Allen's face made him think otherwise. Even when mischievous silver eyes turned to face him and asked, "So what do you see?"

Well, Kanda couldn't say that he saw the sky in Allen's eyes now could he?

-:-

LK-I think that ending was a bit strange, and color or sky seems to fit this better than catch, all well. On another note, I cut my hair really short, it's like Lenalee's now, just a bit longer though. (Panda, I told you I would do it, so don't start sending me those threats now cause I can cut it shorter) anyway, ill keep it up nya! Reviews be love!!

The One and Only, Lonely Kitty


	5. Shot five: Falling

LK- nya! Thanks to all who reviewed!! I'm so happy! I would have posted this yesterday but I had to go to the doctor, grrr XP and it took me even more time since there was an Earthquake in Southern California where I live (its California, I know, but there hasn't been a quake in 13 years, and I am 13 so there) so yea, this was inspired by an act of nature. This is also done entirely in Kanda's POV, I wanted to try something different. Thanks again fro everyone who faved, alerted, and reviewed! Enjoy!

**Disclaimer: in first chapter please! :D**

By: Lonely Kitty

Shot five: Falling

Catching, Falling, Wishing

_I can't always scold you, for being the little idiot you are._

_I can't always protect you, from yourself more than anyone else._

_I can't always be with you when you are alone in the darkness of night._

_But most of all, I can't always catch you, when you fall so hard on your knees._

I think of these things every time as I watch you stumble around like a newborn colt. Your eyes hazy and disoriented with sleep or exhaustion, it is hard to tell with a face as innocent as yours.

But perhaps I think of that even more, that terrible façade. You feign innocence when clearly you are not. Your hands are as deeply drenched in blood as mine are. You know of the rage, the insanity, the lack of morals of war as well as I do, if not better. And yet, are still so different from me.

You carry your heart on your sleeves. You are always so eager to please, is it admiration or adoration or perhaps even reconciliation that you wish from those humans? Even you know that they will never accept you and the path that you have chosen.

That's why every time you carry that vulnerable expression, one so filled with desire and forgiveness, I shall tear it apart. For if you wear that mask forever, someone shall surely steal you away.

Little banters that annoy you so, even I have become accustomed to it. But if it those little fights, be it of your name (I know how you cherish it) your height (though you have grown taller), or your deformities (they don't bother me, they never have), cause you to revel your true self, the one that cries out as nightmares devour your heart and soul at night and despises with a hate I can never come close to, then so be it.

You may hate me, ignore me, do all the little things that practically make me shove Mugen down your throat, but if all that means that you will eventually learn how to stand on your own then I will. Because there is always the chance I won't be near you the next time you fall.

So that's why I push you aside as I pass you in these dark corridors. And you glare half heartedly at me, a piece of cream still smudged stubbornly on your pale lips.

And suddenly, I'm the one who's falling and it's your lips that are pressed so fervently to mine, desperately biting and licking for access. Of course I reply just as eagerly, swiping away the cream with my finger and smearing it over your already cavity sweet lips.

I gasp as my eyes open right next to yours. Silver orbs widened with confusion as my breath come ragged and breathy. I can hear your voice so clearly as your light breath sends shivers down neck.

"Kanda…Kanda are you alright?"

_Do I look alright?!_ I scream within my head, but I'm sure my eyes conveyed the same message as he glared at me with a haughty look. His eyes yelling just as loudly '_well sorry for caring'_

I sighed as I pressed my hand against your chest, pushing you away from me. You look at me with a worried look as you, unbidden, help me to my feet. I brush the nonexistent dust off my uniform to avoid your wary gaze.

"I'm sorry" your tone and your words catches me off guard making me stumble once again. I suppose I must have been wearing a questioning or confused look because you answered my unasked question quickly with a glance.

"For not catching you, you could have gotten hurt." You looked away with a bashful expression, acting as if the wall now had a penchant for shifting into different patterns and colors. I could almost laugh from the irony of your words.

Me? Since when ever did I have a need for saving? If anything, you needed to be saved far more often than me.

Somehow, your face gently disagreed as you look at me with pained eyes. I scoffed, and I pushed my hand through your hair, so soft and light, and laughed.

Your expression, priceless, as you stared bewildered at my actions. Your hand rose up to meet my own, still tangled in your hair. I smirked.

"You worry about your own sorry ass, and ill worry about my own."

Still bewildered, you gave a hesitant nod which was replaced by a determined glare, your pale lips tightening to form a thin line.

But really, leave me to do the saving, because it's your own damn fault that you fall so easily by your own silly delusions in this false world.

-:-

LK-darn it, this fit catch better :P eeh, I…like…this one though I confused myself somewhere in the middle (where Kanda imagines kissing Allen) I have no explanation for that, hints? Ideas? Weird fantasies? XD I try to keep Kanda as in character as possible, Allen to, so if it seems otherwise, please let me know! Please review! Ill do my best nya!

The One and Only, Lonely Kitty


	6. Shot Six: Saving

LK- Nya! Thanks to all who reviewed, faved, and alerted!! I'm so happy! (though the Panda seems a bit irked for another reason…) moving along! This chapter will be done entirely in Allen's P.O.V, almost a continuation to Falling. Please review nya!

**Disclaimer: In first chappie nya! :D**

By: Lonely Kitty

Shot six: Saving

_I never really said that you were important to me._

_But it doesn't change the fact that you are._

_You are my comrade as much as everyone else._

_So please stop saying…that you don't need saving…_

I stared, bored and slightly annoyed as you berated me once again for my naiveness, my clumsiness, my all in all personality. Though it surprised me a bit less than I expected to when I already knew what you were going to say next.

"How about trying to keep yourself alive instead someone who's half dead already you martyr." I scowled, though I was spared any more comments since we were back to back, cornered to each other in this battle.

I could already hear him accusing me of this being my fault in my mind. I allowed myself a grin while I listened to him voice my thoughts, albeit, with a bit more cursing along. He shifted a bit, long raven hair tickled my face as I struggled with the urge to swat it away, if not tug on it a bit.

"Kanda, just believe in me a bit, I can do this." I breathed out, attempting to become indifferent, no mater his response. Though due to our closeness, I couldn't deny the sudden rigidness and stiffness that engulfed your body. I tilted my head back, wondering why, but your face was as stoic as always.

"Che, you'd probably get yourself killed, moyashi." You turned away so all that I could see was the back of your neck. Cautious of your soft tone, when you so usually prefer to yell at me instead, I edged away so that only the sides of our shoulders touched,

Secretly, I was pleased to find that I was catching up to your height, and surely, soon, I would be taller than you. But I doubted that that would stop you from calling me that ridiculous name. Even my face had lost its boyish look and childish round face. Though it took me a while to notice, I don't like to spend time on such trifle maters.

Without warning, because that seems to be its favorite way, my eye began wiring madly, circling around until it found its target.

'_just a few level threes, nothing to really worry about, Kanda doesn't need to be so tense. But that's just his style I suppose.' _I left Kanda's side, I could take care of them all with a single strike. I ignored his yell of anger and instead slashed down on an Akuma that was lying in the shadows.

Briefly, I glanced at the inspector's assistant, his gaze never leaving me or my weapon, and the few finders that had accompanied us. I turned away, not wanting to remind myself that I was still under supervision for a faulty accusation.

Quickly, before the Akuma could attack Kanda's exposed back (though I doubted that he needed the help, being Kanda and all) I sliced it apart, ignoring Kanda's angry gaze while mumbling a silent farewell to the soul.

I landed a few feet away Kanda and withdrew my innocence back into its less conspicuous form. Kanda stalked passed me without so much as a glance, no doubt to pissed off to even yell at me. Silently, I followed.

-:-

Still I followed Kanda as we headed towards Komui to hand in our report. It irked me a bit that ever since I was able to control the ark, I was ordered to open up gates all around the world to make all missions more efficient and quick.

I growled silently, if there was one thing I hated most, it was being **used**. Like a puppet with a renegade puppeteer. Though I knew that I was an exorcist and it was my so called duty, I couldn't help but feel betrayed somehow. I wondered if Kanda felt the same way to…

The inspectors lapdog was strangely absent, a rare first indeed.

I glanced up at the dark swordsman from the corner of my eye. His hair was still swishing to and fro and without a doubt a scowl on his face. I wondered why Kanda had gotten so over-protective lately.

And not just me, with Lavi and Lenalee as well. He had also acquired a habit of taken the more difficult of the missions and vehemently refused any help. It was as if he was trying to shoulder the burden all to himself. How selfish.

Of course, I had been the same a while back, until Lenalee snapped me out of it I guess. It took me while to understand the concept of comrades. For all I knew, I just saw them as other people who merely had innocence, but I never thought them the same as me.

I lived for the Akuma, for their salvation, for their happiness. What more could I ask for when my purpose in life had been fulfilled. But I had gotten distracted, the bright lights and warm hearts of everyone at the order had become even more important to me, so important, I almost forgot about the Akuma. But I was still an exorcist, and that fact wouldn't change until the day I die.

Kanda stopped suddenly and for whatever reason I had noticed only far too late. I fell backwards and crashed to the floor. I muttered a few curses as I glared at Kanda's impassive face.

"What's your problem!?" I yelled out, I guess I was at my limit of patience. Kanda just glanced at me and wordlessly helped me to my feet. I wasn't to out of character to mumble out word of thanks. Sometimes manners were such a pain.

"You should have been looking, che." Kanda turned and continued walking. I growled out another curse before I followed him. I was still quite wary of the new HQ and frankly, the thought of having to memorize _another_ mansion terrified me.

His words however reminded me of something he had told me before. Of only watching out for my back and he would keep to his own…

I stopped dead in my tracks while anger flooded my emotions. I quickly glanced around for the closest throwing object, which was a convenient bowl or random objects used for décor, and chucked one at the brooding samurai's head.

The hit made a nice thunk as I keeled back on the edges of my boots, a triumphant grin plastered on my face. Though when I got no immediate reaction, no Mugen slicing at me in inhumane speed, no…nothing, I began to worry.

I said nothing as Kanda inched towards me, his face carefully composed, though the strange little woven ball I threw at his was clutched in a mangled mess in his right palm.

When he finally looked up I resisted every single urge in my body to scream my apologies and beg to see the light of another day. I bit my tongue, wincing at the sharp iron taste that spread a few scant moments later.

"Kanda…" I mumbled, worried that my shaky breathy voice wouldn't be able to show the emotion I wanted. "Stop being an ass and tell me what's up with you lately." I glared weakly, knowing for sure now that he wouldn't take me seriously. Instead, he just smirked and leaned down until we were eyes level. Unconsciously, I shifted back a little to lessen the distance.

"You, are a fucking idiot. You think that everyone who isn't fucking trippy happy needs saving." I trembled in anger and leaned forward to glare back with more intensity. "Well guess what, I don't need saving, I don't need help, and for sure I don't need your pity!!" Only now did I realize that Kanda had grasped the collar of my uniform, lifting me up a few centimeters from the ground. He shoved me backward and I collided with the wall. _Ouch_, that _hurt._

I could hear his heavy breathing now that it was my turn to be silent. I looked up only to see that he was staring downward, shoulders still heaving and breath still labored. I sighed as I rolled my shoulder, attempting to get rid of the ache and bruise that was most likely spreading.

Stiffly, I stood and strided past him, as he did to me earlier, but I stopped until we were a few apart. Loudly enough that he could hear I said…

"Kanda, what do you think comrades are for? To stand idly by while someone who's fought with you for years is getting beaten to death right before your eyes, do you honestly think anyone would just 'watch their own back' while that is happening?!'" I hadn't known how strong or how deranged my voice had become until I heard my voice ringing into my own ears.

I took a deep breath before looking at Kanda, he was staring at me with a funny expression.

"Everyone needs saving at least once in their life, don't stand around in the dark Yu."

I smiled at him while his frown grew. In three short strides, Kanda towered over me with a baleful look and a tinge of, could it be, remorse marring his scowl.

"Call me by my name again and I'll kill you baka moyashi." Hints of a smirk tugged at the edges of his lips. I smiled.

-:-

"You.Got.Us.Fucking.Lost." Kanda growled through clenched teeth. I felt a shiver run down my spine, almost knowing without a doubt that his hand was already on Mugen's hilt.

"Well, you let me lead! How was I suppose to know my way around this place?" my voice came out higher and more panic filled than I would have liked.

I didn't need to look back to know that Kanda had drawn his sword and was advancing on my at a terrifying speed. I also didn't need telling that running would only make it worse…but someone should have probably told me anyway.

'_everyone needs saving at least once in their life Kanda, everyone.'_

-:-

LK- nya, there you go! Yesh, I never knew writing in Allen's pov would be so hard, Kanda's was so much easier. Please tell me if Allen seems strange! Special thanks to JudaiHaou'sGirl for being extra supportive! As always, reviews are love! Until then, ill do my best nya!

The One and Only, Lonely Kitty


	7. Shot Seven: Good Bye

LK- T^T I Live! Sorta… I'll be writing a one-shot for Yullen week, next two drabbles for CFW are to cure my writers block before I get onto the one-shot (I want to make it good) Thanks to all who reviewed!!! I'm so happy!~ Unfortunately, this is really short and kind of has no plot, oh well.

**Disclaimer: In first chapter please**

**Warnings: Nothing really, slight language and un-betaed.**

By: Lonely Kitty

Shot seven: Good Bye

Allen wasn't good with good byes, he just wasn't. Goodbyes meant leaving, leaving meant sadness, and sadness goes hand in hand with sorrow and death. Allen did not like goodbyes, he loathed them.

Kanda had long ago learned not to care. Caring meant actually doing something other than being an antisocial bastard, not being an ass meant having some social decency, sociality meant friends, and friends would just lead to ruin. Kanda learned this long ago, so that is why he doesn't want to care, not again, not anymore. But not wanting to however, is not a guarantee. Kanda didn't _want_ to care, but he did anyway.

This is why Kanda calls Allen weak, because Allen obstinately refuses to learn the rules that govern war. He chooses to defy them, to fight as he deems acceptable. For some reason, Kanda finds this trait annoying…and admirable. But edging more to the annoying side.

* * *

In the evenings when Allen has time to himself (however rare and far between) he finds simple pleasure in the quite murmurs of the outside. Secretly, hurriedly, leaves of willow and oak brush against each other, creating a hushed crinkle. Allen sighed, content with the brief encounter he was sharing with nature.

"Che, figures. I thought I would find you here." The white haired youth gave no noticeable response to the samurai as he settled beside him.

Kanda walked up bedside the lone boy and leaned beside him on the railing. The two stayed that way, silent and unmoving, for uncountable moments until Allen's stiff legs finally began to cramp.

After some thought, Allen finally let his curiosity get the better of him.

"What is it Kanda, that you actually took the time to come out and find me?"

This time, it was Kanda's turn to be silent. He glanced at the gloved hand that hid Allen's Innocence. As of lately, he saw less and less of his deformed hand, and for some reason, that irked him. He suddenly wanted to see the grotesque hand once again, to see what really made it so horrible that when seen at first glance, it made civilians scream in terror. It was just a hand right?

Kanda sighed out loud, briefly noting the puffs of hot breath clouding around his head.

"Do I need a reason to come outside or is that privilege suddenly restricted to?" Kanda finally huffed out with a note of boredom.

Allen's eyes widened in surprise for a moment before closing in a pleased manner, a soft chuckle escaping his frozen lips.

"No…I suppose not."

Kanda hated goodbyes. In moments so peaceful and so rare to find, he found it more and more difficult to leave the fragile tranquility. For once, he was content to stay next to this cursed child. Staring at nothing in particular, neither wanting to utter the two words that would eventually come and quietly bring them back to the world.

* * *

LK- =_= gah, I hated that last part. This is just a random drabble to get rid of writers block and to kill off some Lavi bunnies that have seen fit to make my mind a living wreak. Anyway, there's a sudden frosty front in Southern California lately, it actually **rained**. How many times in the year does that happen? But the mountains look really pretty, I want to go. Anyway, reviews much appreciated!! I need help with getting rid of this annoying inability to write satisfying fanfiction T^T it makes me sad, until then, ill do my best nya~!

~The One and Only, Lonely Kitty


	8. Shot Eight: Capricious

LK- nya, this is even drabble-ier than the last one, and still short… I wrote these a while back in my math class cause there is very little else to do in that but sleep. Anyway, I thought these somewhat worthy enough to post, even if they are kind of strange. Actually, I could make each drabble a separate chapter but I decided to leave them be. Oh well, still have a nasty case of writers block, reviews will be loved!!!

**Disclaimer: in first chapter please~!**

By: Lonely Kitty

Shot Eight: Capricious

Catching, Falling, Wishing

Allen hated it. He hated it so much, so much he could scream. But hates a strong word, despise would be better. Allen's disdain failed to lessen over time, instead growing stronger and stronger by the day. Though he never let it show. He carefully hid his secret little feelings behind the composed mask of a smile. Still, the feelings grew steadily until they threatened to overflow into a brand new feeling, **fear**. As Allen watches Kanda stalk away with his quiet dignified solitary air. So cold, so proud, so very very lonely. Allen despised it. That silent supremacy that reminded him of how he used to be. How he should be right now. How, in sometime in the near future that might become him to. An emotionless warrior of god who uses his sword to display his emotions. Through a mask, through a smile.

* * *

Kanda was surprised, if not disgusted. How the hell did that much food fit into such a little body?! Rather than ponder the incredible phenomenon, Kanda let his eyes trace over Allen's hunched shoulders. Small, like a girl's. Midnight eyes wandered lower over the slight decline of his backside, devouring every angle and curve that the white haired boy had like a starving beast readying himself for a long awaited meal. Kanda flushed as his mind wandered to other less visible places hidden on the cursed boy's body. The samurai returned to eating his soba, though for some reason, he hungered for an entirely different reason.

* * *

Allen was not a good child. No, he was a thieving, lying, blackmailing card shark who just happened to have a pleasant and kind demeanor and an abhorrence to alcohol and smoking (they made him terribly sick and brought back days he would rather forget) Kanda oh just so happened to never even think of tainting his body with such impurities as nicotine or port and led a strict life of self discipline and solitude. And considering his nationality, probably never as much touched a pack of playing cards much less played them. In Allen's point of view, Kanda was a very good child. Albeit, one with horrid people skills and an attitude problem. Yeah, but he probably wouldn't get that fixed until Allen decides to stop cheating at poker.

* * *

Kanda knew Allen wasn't innocent. He knew that damn well. But it was that trusting face of wanting, that pristine white hair, those stormy silver eyes, that petite form. Such a cute kid could never be a killer. However, the experience of many years in war with false appearances at every edge had taught Kanda the rule that was burned to his very core. **Looks** are **Very** deceiving. One may be the devil in disguise, posing as a chubby friendly uncle with an eternal grin etched upon his face. Still, he watched and listened and without a word or action, he witnessed the little snow colored boy fall into dark depths, far deeper than he had ever gone and ever dared to go.

* * *

Allen sighed as he nibbled on his straw. He was still yet unsatisfied with the plain cuisine of the rural area of some suburb town he had not taken the time to remember the name of. He placed the dish next to some dozen other plates and settled to glace over the metal rim of a soda at his companion. He arched a brow as he noticed Kanda picking idly at his food, disinterest and boredom in place of his scowl. Allen settled his chin into the palm of his hand, silver eyes still glued to the idle samurai. In truth, Allen knew little of Kanda's diet other than soba, but still, the man must like some other type of food! With all the delicious food in the world, must he stick to one favorite? Allen had as many favorite dishes as Cross had lovers. And in both situations, still counting. Bored beyond belief, Allen decided to risk the backlash of insult and ask Kanda of his preferred diet. Amazingly, the usual antisocial man answered him without attitude.

"It's too bland, I like foods with flavor. Spicy and hot."

Allen raised his eyebrow again but replied with a disinterested "oh" After a moment he smiled and turned to Kanda who was beginning to doze off.

"Me to."

* * *

Kanda fought off an oncoming yawn. The day had been lazy and boring and the seemingly promising rumors of innocence had just been the raving thoughts of a mad woman. Kanda turned to glance around to check if the moyashi had returned yet. Allen, equally bored but still full of energy, had offered to look around for some lodging some time ago. He had been gone for four hours and it didn't seem like he would return anytime soon.

"Moyashi probably got lost somewhere…or attacked."

Just as Kanda stood up to look for the stupid beansprout he heard a scream that was all too familiar down the road in the alleyway. Immediately Kanda sprinted to the location and had drawn Mugen only to confront a flustered Allen and a massive mongrel of fur and salvia lapping at the grounded boy beneath him. Allen yelped again as the mutt gave a long slimy lick at his neck. Wide silver eyes glanced up to catch sight of ebony locks. With a pleading look Allen begged to be rescued from the beast. The conniving beast, finally noticing the other growled as he stepped protectively over his prize. Kanda gave the mutt a glare that sent him scrambling away with his tail between his legs. Relived Allen stood up on trembling legs, explaining the dog had been following him for a while now and had refused to let him be and eventually cornered him in the alleyway. He wiped the excess water from his face and turned to face his companion only to receive another shock.

"Kanda…Kanda are you laughing?!"

* * *

LK- Nya, I'm tired =_=' Well, that last one was random, I just let my fingers type whatever they wanted for once. I fear my inner subconscious now. Nya! It's Panda's fault!!! I couldn't finish the one-shot for Yullen week cause of her! Grr, ill have to post it tomorrow. Anyways, reviews and constructive criticism is loved! Until then, ill do my best nya!~

~The One and Only, Lonely Kitty


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